Monday, March 25, 2013

Doomsday


 
This just shattered me. I received it on mail sometime back and I have never felt so let down; so depressed; so miserable ever. EVER.
I adore Ruskin Bond. Rather I worship Ruskin Bond; ever since eternity.Today seeing him share a frame with Chetan Bullshit Bhagat is killing me.


 Damn, what is the world coming to?


This is like keeping Amitabh Bachchan in the same frame as Poltu da. (The guy who gets to act in the plays during Durga Puja as the side hero and is tolerated only and only because he is the son of the secretary of the para club)


The very thought of Mr. Bond discussing literature with Chetan is enough to get bile up my throat.


Sigh! I must have sinned real bad to have received this today. I know, I shouldn’t have ignored that “If you do not send this to a thousand people in the next thousand seconds something really bad is going to happen to you. The last person who ignored this got her ass stuck on the toilet seat with a Chetan Crap Bhagat book in her hand” mail I got yesterday.


Doomsday isn’t far, people, it isn’t far.



48 comments:

  1. An excerpt from this article: http://zeenews.india.com/exclusive/jaipur-literature-festival-2013-i-have-a-responsibility-to-bring-forth-budding-writers-says-ravinder_6008.html

    "'There is a wide gap being drawn between the kind of mass-friendly books that Chetan Bhagat writes and the heavy literary ones written by Sir Salman Rushdie. Can you comment on that?'

    'Both these authors are good. The difference is that they have different audiences. People who listen to rock music are different, as are those who love listening to Hindustani classical music. But both are doing well in their own ways.'"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's Ravinder Singh. You couldn't have expected anything better than that, right?

      Delete
    2. Hey, you liked the Shiva trilogy (despite it's self-confessed pedestrian writing quality), and you are reading the Inheritance series as well...
      And I read the entire Potter series, despite it's progressively detoriorating plot-lines (PS,PoA, HBP are the only books I really liked... OoTP was rock-bottom)

      Altruistic Moral: We are different people at different times in our lives... Be nice to others for their shortcomings.

      P.S.- About Chetan Bhagat, we'll ahve to start a completely different thread of discussion (Is it just me, or are his recent cheesy, plastic photos *REALLY* puke-inducing?). And who the fuck is Ravinder Singh???

      Delete
    3. Okay, let me make myself clear. I enjoyed Meluha for the story line; mid-way Nagas that was lost. Haven't read Vayuputras yet. And I agree Amishs' writing quality is quite sad. I am enjoying the Inheritence Series. But can't compare it to Harry Potter. HP is super awesome literature. Sad you didn't like it.

      I agree to each his own. My fury here is due to chetan bhagat being kept at the same platform as Ruskin Bond. Being a staunch admirer of Bond, it's extremely difficult for me to digest this. IT IS NOT FAIR.

      No, it's not just you. Chetan Bhagat's cheese plastic photos and the sermons he gives to women are puke inducing.

      You have to know, HAVE TO KNOW Ravinder Singh and Durjoy Dutta. Do google them please. They are the current bestseller authors of our country :( :( (they basically write cheap Indian Mills n Boons with sad titles)

      Delete
    4. Have to give it to Mlvk here (with a polite 'hi'). You like the Shiva Trilogy, so I guess the day is not far when you'll end up liking Chetan Bhagat as well.

      Of course, it's a crime to live in India and not know both Durjoy Datta (not Dutta) and Ravinder Singh.

      Delete
    5. I take a deep breath; I calm my mind; I repeat - I. Do. Not. Like. The. Shiva. Trilogy. And I will get eaten by a hippogriff before I end up liking Chetan Bhagat X(

      Delete
    6. Dipoo, I'd rather you be eaten by that gorilla from 'Escape'!!! :D :P
      OK, OK, you *DO* not the trilogy.

      Abhishek, hi!
      Found you when I was scanning blogs on Indian mythology, and I also have a *soft spot* for Fardeen Khan. :)

      Delete
    7. A gorilla won't be able to handle me. :D

      Abhishek, Mlvk introduced me to your blog :) (which was sure a lucky day for you)

      Delete
    8. Hi again, Mlvk. Indian mythology is the most hot and happening aspect of life, even more than Nikki Bakshi.

      I am glad to learn that you have a soft spot for Fardeen Khan as well. It's unfortunate that he has quit acting. He has been a constant source of entertainment and inspiration for dejected souls like me.

      Just curious - are you allergic to vowels for some reason?

      Delete
    9. No, I am only allergic to people who jump to conclusions. :P
      (And to captchas... GRRRRRRRR!)

      Delete
    10. So why do you not use the vowels (and only the vowels) in your Blogger handle? And as for captchas, I am probably a robot: I had once succeeded to go past a captcha only on the ninth attempt.

      I have always believed in more vowels and less captchas. That, in a nut-shell, sums up the philosophy of my life.

      Delete
    11. !@#$%^&* MY BLOG IS NOT A CHATTING SITE X( X( ... use GTalk

      And for people who use this as a chatting site - the captchas stay. X(

      Delete
    12. M(a)l(a)v(i)k(a), it's ovshake at gmail dot com. I feel terribly unwanted here. Maybe I'll sit somewhere in a corner of the cyberworld and sulk.

      Delete
    13. Just to piss you off Dipoo, I'll take on the captchas, and continue chatting here!

      Delete
    14. Yeah, what the heck. Let us carry on here.

      Delete
    15. Thought this will change everyone's lives. My last captcha was ewlo 2222. I will keep posting my captchas every now and then until she disables them.

      Delete
    16. Also it's Dipooo (with 3 o's)... THAT IS VERY IMPORTANT.

      Delete
    17. Ovshake, So why do you not use your entire face (and only your eye) in your Blogger profile pic? I have always believed in more 'whole' and less 'parts'. That, in a nut-shell, sums up the philosophy of my life.

      And as for captchas, did you try the 'audio' option before your ninth attempt?

      Delete
    18. I got a captcha with two Os, though: ghoyo 1433.

      Delete
    19. Abhishek, I am sure you are enjoying this... Just *LOOK* at all those vowels!

      Delete
    20. Mlvk, I'm enjoying this TOO. I think Deepti (:D) will BROOD on my STOOPING so low, but it's providing us FOOD for our souls. Also, I'm getting rather GOOD at this, and will get into the MOOD SOON.

      Delete
    21. Thank you, Deepti Rowt, for removing the captcha. It has changed my life, for sure.

      Delete
    22. All for my loyal readers, Avisek.

      Delete
  2. Oh Di!I so agree with you,but you see there are quite a number of people in this world who are unable to do justice to good quality literature like that of Durjoy Dutta and compare them to the likes of Ms.Rowling & Mr.Bond! Chetan Bhagat,Durjoy and Ravinder and oh! how could I forget Amish are really 'Grassroot' writers who can never appeal to any mental age beyond infancy (root of the grass as being before born and henceforth:)But then with all the work & performance stress,what's wrong in being 'idiots' sometime.
    (Disclaimer:this should be read in a catty/coquettish tone)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Amish can't write. Period. CB had a vocabulary of about a hundred words when he started, which he has managed to stretch to his coveted 200-mark. By the time he quits, I daresay mention he may make it to 500.

      Why are we even mentioning CB and 007 in the same line?

      Delete
    2. I read 'The Immortals of Meluha' and I have to agree with you: Amish can't write.

      Amish had an attention grabbing concept to begin with and he had his MBA marketing skills. As for the book, I suspect there was more than one person writing it; Amish, his wife, his kids, his kaamwali bai, his editor and his liftman (in that order, most likely).

      Delete
    3. I too think the kids were in this. They carry the genes of Amish and the woman who chose Amish as a partner.

      Delete
    4. Just loved Mlvk's comment....you left out the doorman and the bhajiwalah:D:D

      Delete
  3. I don't have problems with JKR's English skills... quite the contrary. I just think she lost the plot midway... OoTP was the biggest and most unnecessary volume of the series. You can sum it up in 50 pages. And the ending of DH was a huge, huge let-down too. At some point, it felt like JKR started writing for the movie scripts instead of books.

    Your fury is justified, it is a *HUGE* insult to Ruskin Bond, but well, he agreed to be part of it. So we'll have to live with it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sigh, yes we'll have to live with it. I would just like to believe that Ruskin Bond must have really cringed to do this and must have done this only to maintain his equation with the publisher. :(

      Delete
  4. I feel you need to explain more the reason for your anger. I understand your centiment but its a fact whether you like it or not that Chetan Bhagat is also popular with whatever he writes. And I dont think he also falls in the class of DD or RS.
    Its like an Amitabh Bachchan fan reacting when he sees him sharing the screen with Salman Khan. We all know that Salman is no where in comparison with Mr. Bachchan as far as acting skills are concerned, but its ok. I see nothing doomsdayish in it. It would be rather interesting to know Mr. Bond's view about Mr. Bhagat.
    However there is no denying that as far as writing skills are concerned CB is nonsense compared to the class of RB.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That, unfortunately, is a wrong comparison. Salman is a brilliant actor. No two ways about it. (Deep breath again)

      This isn't about popularity. Chetan Bhagat is popular; so is Durjoy Datta and Ravinder Singh. Rakhi Sawant is also popular; so is Kyuki saas bhi kabhi bahu thi.

      Unfortunately, the good ones are the ones who are not popular. Ruskin Bond isn't, Amitava Ghosh isn't.

      No, it's not about popularity. It's about legends being given the same honour as those who are nowhere in the league as far as good literature is concerned, but are unfortunately popular.

      No, I would never wish to know what Ruskin Bond has to say about chetan bhagat; because it is just not important.

      Delete
    2. I had to retrieve this comment of yours from the spam folder. Do you know why? Anything against Salmaan, on this blog, gets into spam. :)

      Delete
    3. Snort! Giggle!!... Mwahahaha!!!

      OK, I'll control myself. Vivi's turning out to be a starry-eyed Salman fan too... You are *NOT* going to believe what she said for her "Show and tell: Your favourite community helper" (3 years are expected to not only know what 'community' is, but also learn about 'community helpers, and have a favourite one too!!!) So I tried to get her to talk abt Policemen. And to reinforce it, I told her "Just like Salman Khan in that movie (Dabangg 2), right?!" So the little miss goes to school and says " My favourite (mumble, mumble) is SALMAN KHAN.... He's very, very strrrrong and does dhishoom dhishoom to all the bad peoples, and then they fall down, and then he puts them all the peoples in the jail." We got to hear abt this at the PTA that month... :P

      Delete
    4. I cannot believe the way this conversation is going. Chetan Bhagat, then Amish, then Durjoy Datta, then Ravinder Singh, and now Salman Khan.

      Delete
    5. Ok. Now you have lost it by saying Salman Khan is a brilliant actor. He has not won a single non commercial award ( I mean awards which are not in the ranks of Filmfare, Zee Cine Awards, Stardust Award etc etc etc) for his acting. The only National Award he has won along with UTV Softwafre Communication is for producing the film Chillar Party. Your comment of making Salman Khan a brilliant actor as comapared to Amitabh Bachchan goes bang into anyone's spam box.
      I was not comparing Chetan Bhagat's popularity with that of Mr. Bond. Both are writers of different styles. That doesnt deny the fact that Chetan Bhagat is a sad writer when compared to Mr. Bond. But your bringing in of K Serials and Rakhi Sawant is something that I didnt expect out of you.
      Writing something out of emotion and passion is brilliant but writing the same without responsibility is not so great.
      The attack on Chetan Bhagat is not the point, the issue is the lack of clarity in your approach in attacking him.

      Delete
    6. Subhro, now you are getting senti (abt K-serials and Rakhi!!!)
      Abhishek, that's the whole point of conversation... it flows... go with the flow :D

      Delete
    7. Malavika, thanks for saving me from replying to Subhro. :)

      Delete
    8. If Subhro goes senti about Rakhi, I definitely get mental. Between us, we complete the required emotion.

      Delete
  5. I can imagine the conversation:

    Chetan: Hey there. I'm the voice of the new Indian youth, can write sleaze and make it sell, and write derogatory comments on Indian women and get known as a feminist.

    Ruskin: The name is Bond. Ruskin Bond. (takes out a revolver)

    And thus, my friends, Indian literature is saved.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ... Ruskin Bond, after waiting for that elusive Nobel Prize over a period spanning several decades, finally wins it for Peace.

      Delete
    2. :D :D :D. and RB with a gun and buxom Rakhi Sawant wrapped around her but wait.."picture abhi baki hain mere dost"

      Delete
    3. OMG! RB and RS! Ruskin Bond ka Swayamvar! :D

      Delete

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