Monday, June 23, 2014

All I needed was some arsenic...

Low, upset, sad, depressed - whatever it is, it is not a nice thing. No, you end up crying during every scene of Hum Saath Saath Hai... when you are sad. I do.

I was very low the other day. The only thing I was craving for was, well, arsenic. Why, you may ask?
It's because arsenic is my favourite poison.

It's just that I didn't really want arsenic because I don't look forward to die, yet, I did want arsenic.

So, instead, I decided to write "Contains Arsenic" on my big, white, water drinking mug so that ever time I drink water I may believe and feel good about drinking Arsenic. (Yeah, I drink water in a mug. Because I think it is cool. Arsenic in a mug is cooler)

My friend, D2 had once told me that good handwriting was a skill she was mighty proud of and I wanted my arsenic to look good so I took the mug to her.

But this is what she did!

All that I wanted was some neat and clean arsenic. She made my arsenic look ugly which is not a nice thing to do to someone who is upset.

And because I got more upset she wrote it again on the other side and this is how it looked - horrible.

This time I burst out crying. (Shut up! I was seriously upset)

Seeing me cry, D2 got extremely worked up and started shrieking, "Oh my God, Oh my God, please don't cry I will do something about the mug, it will look fine again. Don't cry, Diptee."

And then this is what she did -

Seriously, this was her idea of setting it right for me! Seriously! Striking out and rewriting below!

And later, when I showed her the picture, she exclaimed, "Oh, cool, you clicked a picture of my crotch!" That totally made me miserable. 

(I know you guys scrolled up to take another look at that picture. You are sick! *rolls eyes*)

I walked up to her desk, picked up her mug (I have no idea what she used it for so I had to give it a wild scrub first) and scrubbed and scratched off whatever was written on it.

Finally I wrote on the mug (my handwriting sucks but by now I was too tired to bother) and drank gallons of arsenic water from it to feel better.

I did feel better. I guess. It did not kill me but it did kill something, within.


PS. I am lucky to have friends like D2 and D1 (though she wasn't around on this particular day) to give me a laugh every time I feel horrible.

PPS. I have no idea why I wrote this but I feel better after writing it. So, well. I know it made no sense and I am sorry you had to go through it.

PPPS. Yes, that is a bottle of benadryl on the background in the last picture. It is there not because I am unwell but because I love benadryl. (people who know me, know that)

If a man lures me with a bottle of benadryl, I will elope with him. (Okay, a man who looks like Sirius Black and lures me with a bottle of benadryl... and has a farmhouse in the European countryside, I will elope with him.)

PPPPS. (Not sure if PPPS and PPPPS even exists) D2 sent me this picture and called it, "Arsenic love". She is crazy!


  1. Benadryl and arsenic would make a heady shot, no? You'd die on a high!
    By the way, I like D2's style of writing! :D

    1. Yeah, I'd like that!

      I would have liked D2's style too was I not upset. Being upset makes me OCD ish

    2. I agree with the Benadryl-arsenic combination. Add some sugar to that for more impact.

  2. Oh Diptee di...
    Did you spend the whole day drinking make-believe Arsenic? :-/
    It's a really weird post. And I am so glad you feel better after typing this.

    I'm home alone. Miserable because Pippo still won't come home.
    And my hands smell of cat food. :P Maybe I should try drinking water and pretend it is vodka :D

    1. Yeah, I did. :(

      Maybe I will drop in one of these days for some dark chocolate dessert. That way we shall both feel better.

  3. I like your hand writing...! :)And such random posts r the best to read! Aro aro chai!


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